


Nature of the Beast

by sabaceanbabe



Series: Nature [3]
Category: Battlestar Galactica (2003)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-05-12
Updated: 2005-05-12
Packaged: 2017-10-06 23:55:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/59102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sabaceanbabe/pseuds/sabaceanbabe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sharon leaves Helo and Kara, all of them still trapped on Caprica.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nature of the Beast

Today had simply been overwhelming. First, Kara had learned that Commander Adama had lied to them all. (Lied to her.) Then she had returned to Caprica to find that humanity's uninvited houseguests had trashed the place. (Destroyed her home.) And now she knew without the shadow of a doubt that a woman she had known for months, whom she considered a friend, was a Cylon. (Her enemy.)

"Oh, and let's not forget," she muttered to herself, "one of my best friends got the Cylon pregnant." Kara hissed as a spoonful of hot stew – eaten straight from the can – burned the gash in her bottom lip. There had been only two bright spots in the day: beating the shit out of that blonde Cylon bitch and discovering that Helo was still alive.

Thoughts of Helo drew Kara inexorably to thoughts of Sharon. Kara's eyes drifted to the Cylon who slept on the other side of the fire. She didn't appear to be comfortable, even in sleep, but if Sharon was as emotionally drained as Kara felt, she wouldn't have to be comfortable to sleep. And it _was_ Sharon; Kara didn't doubt that any more than she doubted Sharon was a Cylon and always had been. The only thing she wasn't sure of was whether the version that remained on Galactica had any clue.

Leoben had known he was a Cylon. The blonde this morning had certainly known. And the woman who currently slept by the fire, who had Helo tied up in knots, knew exactly what she was. But Boomer? Boomer had become more and more conflicted after the attacks on the Colonies. Everyone, Kara included, had put it down to stress and her breakup with the Chief. Now she thought it must be something else entirely; stress, but with an added edge.

This Sharon, Helo's Sharon (the one he had prevented Kara from killing), had said that she didn't know where she belonged anymore. Kara believed it.

The fire sent up a shower of sparks and she took another bite of stew, tracking the flickering embers as they flew and faded out against the stars above. Clouds drifted across the crescent moon and there was the faint scent of rain in the air. Judging by the moon's position in the sky, it was almost time for her to relieve Helo.

Kara realized then that she and Helo hadn't had much time to talk since their unexpected reunion. "Poor guy doesn't even know how bad it is out there."

It hadn't taken the Cylons long to discover them in the museum, to chase them out. She and Helo had speculated while making camp whether the death of the one Sharon called "Six" had brought the others, but Sharon had said no, it didn't work like that. That had started Helo sniping at Sharon and Kara had left them to it; she didn't think they'd even noticed when she left for her bath.

Swallowing the last of her stew, she stoked the fire, opened another can and put it near the flames to heat, and then went to find Helo.

***

"Hey." Helo's voice startled her. It came from a few meters to the right of where Kara had stopped to get her bearings in the darkness – the waning moon hadn't provided much light, but there was even less now that the clouds had won the battle.

"Hey yourself." Kara took a couple of steps toward his voice. As she moved closer, his outline became distinct from the trees which surrounded him. "You ready for some rest? I saved you a can of stew…"

He laughed – the sound was bitter, brittle. "Yay, stew." A couple of steps brought him to her side. He looked toward the campfire, just visible through the trees. "Don't worry about it, Starbuck. I can't sleep anyway and I'm not hungry. You can go—"

"Don't give me that crap, Raptor Boy. I know you. You're never 'not hungry' and you can sleep anywhere, anytime."

"Not anymore, Kara." His voice was quiet, nothing of laughter or irreverence in it. She looked at him sharply, but he still faced toward camp. Toward Sharon. He sucked at his lower lip, clearly troubled.

They walked for a few minutes, long enough for Helo to accept that she wasn't going away, before Kara broke the silence. "There are some things you need to know, Helo."

"Oh, Gods, not again. You're not going to tell me you're pregnant, too, are you?"

She smiled and guessed that Sharon must have phrased her revelation in just that way. "Lords, no. Nope, only one knocked up around here is your girlfriend." She mentally smacked herself when he winced at her flippant remark – under normal circumstances, they could say anything to each other without fear of hurt feelings or misunderstanding. She stopped him with a soft touch at his wrist. "Helo, you've been out of the loop for weeks," she noted.

He turned to her, his face a lighter shade of dark in the non-light. A wry smile appeared, a parody of his usual wicked grin. "You think?"

"How much do you know of what's happened?" The last time she had seen him was the day everything had come crashing down. She had lost one of the truly good things in her life when Boomer had returned to Galactica without Helo. Kara cringed at the more recent memory of the man for whom Helo had given up his place on that Raptor.

Helo's voice brought her back to the present. "The Cylons attacked us." He stripped a leaf from the tree next to him, shredded it as he spoke. "Most of what I've seen of Caprica has been devastation, so I'm guessing it was pretty bad for us, for the Colonies…"

"Bad," she murmured, laughed a bitter laugh of her own. "You could say that." Searching his eyes in the darkness, still she hesitated. "Karl…" How do you tell someone that they've lived through the end of everything? That they're probably dead already, but just too stubborn to give up?

"Just say it, Kara. I won't break."

Examining what little she could see of his face, she realized that he had lived that reality as thoroughly as she. There was no need to sugar-coat what he needed to know. "Karl, it's all gone. There are no Colonies anymore. The Cylons didn't just hit Caprica." She watched his jaw tighten and took hold of his hand before inflicting the worst of it on him. "There are fewer than 50,000 of us left."

His hand tightened on hers. "Fif…" His voice was just a whisper. "How?"

"They took down our defense systems. A virus or something." His grip tightened further, began to hurt, but she didn't pull away.

"Sh-Sharon and I saw the squadron just…stop. They drifted, no power, no way out. It was a frakkin' massacre."

"The same thing happened all over the Fleet. Galactica is all that's left." Kara noticed the slight break in his voice when he said Sharon's name, but she didn't let on. She could only imagine what he was going through, knowing that the only person he'd had contact with in two months wasn't a person at all.

"Gods." Helo seemed to realize that he was hurting Kara's hand. He loosened his grip, but didn't let go. When he turned toward camp again, she knew he was thinking about the Cylon who waited there. Then his attention returned to Kara. "How did the Galactica survive? Her obsolete systems?"

"Mm hmm. The Mark VIIs were vulnerable to Cylon code. We're using the Mark IIs that were in the museum section."

He laughed at that; Helo had always been able to see the humor in even the darkest of things. But there was no laughter in his voice when he said, "Fifty thousand left out of how many billions?"

With that, the sky opened up as though the heavens wept for the gods' lost children.

***

Sharon didn't know what woke her. She bolted upright and squelched the sudden queasiness the movement generated. Her muscles were stiff and sore, her shoulder on fire, but that hadn't been what had awakened her. She looked around and saw that she was alone. Her muscles protested when she rolled into a crouch. She ignored the discomfort, reaching out with every sense to pinpoint the location of whatever it was that had set off the alarms in her head.

Without warning, the clouds above burst, drenching her and dousing the small fire in an instant, but Sharon didn't move. She heard something through the rain.

There, to the south…

"Cylons!" Sharon sprang to her feet with a shout. She rushed to gather up Helo's pack and the Arrow of Apollo. "South of us! We have to go!"

The other two raced back into camp, hand in hand, and Sharon couldn't stop the wave of jealousy that sliced through her. Even as their hands parted and Helo ran to take the pack from Sharon's fingers, the image burned into her retinas. Helo had to tug the pack from her hands and she stumbled, fell hard on her arm. The pain from the gunshot wound almost stole her consciousness, but then he was there, helping her to her feet. He didn't let go of her as he pulled her away from camp, following Starbuck.

And then the Centurions were close enough that Starbuck and Helo could hear them, too. The menacing, mechanical sounds spurred the trio on. Helo still hadn't released Sharon's arm, but she didn't know if it was because of concern for her welfare or concern that she might escape – she knew he couldn't yet understand that she didn't _want_ to escape. Not from him.

There was a loud report, somewhat muffled by the trees through which they ran. It sounded as though the shot whizzed over their heads and Sharon thought the Centurions must have instructions not to kill. Rather than pausing to return fire, the three continued to run, their only intent to stay ahead of the Cylons.

Helo, breathless, asked, "How many?"

"More than one, but I don't know how many." She risked a quick glance at him; his eyes were fixed on the back of Starbuck's head, only a couple of meters ahead of them, yet almost obscured by the downpour.

"You don't know?" He was all disbelief. "Aren't you networked?"

She glared at him. "Go to hell, Helo." But then rolled his face toward her for just a second. There was an almost teasing look in his hazel eyes. "Could you at least try to sound winded?" Sharon's heart almost stopped – his tone was so much closer to the way it had been before he knew what she was. She tripped again, but he didn't let her fall. The teasing light faded from Helo's eyes and she realized how much she had missed it these past few days.

***

Kara was blindsided by a violent shiver as she waited. "Why did I ever think I'd miss the rain?" They'd have to find shelter for the evening soon. Someplace dry, if possible, since they couldn't risk a fire. Water, surprisingly cold, dripped from her hair, her chin, the end of her nose.

They had been on the run for three solid days. And it had rained the entire frakking time. She had forgotten how miserable this part of Caprica could be during summer, and that was when there wasn't a nuclear winter setting in. Kara regretted landing the Raider within the city rather than in the countryside surrounding Delphi. They had tried several times to circle around to retrieve it, but the Cylons had been determined not to allow them anywhere near it or any other vehicle, space-going or not.

Kara supposed they would still have had to find another, larger ship to get back to Galactica. The problem was that there were three of them now. She barely fit into the Raider alone, and while she didn't mind the thought of squeezing into her with Helo, squeezing in with both Helo and Sharon was too much. She wouldn't be able to work the controls in that kind of close quarters. "Unless Sharon has some sort of affinity with a fellow Cylon… Maybe she can fly her."

Kara looked over at the Cylon, heaving her lunch out while Helo held her. Seemed like a poor programming choice, keeping the morning sickness. When Sharon recovered from this latest bout, they'd move on. Before the toasters caught up to them again.

***

Helo stood first watch while Starbuck went through the motions of setting up camp for the night – neither of them would let Sharon help, for reasons of their own. Sharon suspected that Helo was protecting her again, while Starbuck clearly didn't trust her.

Sharon's eyes were drawn from her lover to the Viper pilot whom she knew through borrowed memories, and yet didn't know at all. Starbuck opened three cans of vegetable stew for their evening meal, not that Sharon was hungry or could keep the cold stew down if she did eat.

Starbuck seemed to feel the weight of Sharon's gaze as brown eyes met brown. "Hungry?" she asked, holding out one of the open cans and a spoon.

"Maybe…" She placed a hand on her stomach. "Stew tonight, huh? I guess it beats beans." Beans. That thought made her stomach turn a 180 and she closed her eyes for a second, waiting for it to settle. When she opened them again, she was surprised to see Starbuck gesture for her to come sit beside her on the damp ground. The rain had stopped more than an hour ago and a stiff breeze had picked up, but nothing was truly dry.

Sharon scooched closer, as requested. "What did I do this time?"

Starbuck shook her head and gave her a lopsided smile. "Sorry about what I said this afternoon."

"Why?" Sharon was truly mystified. Why apologize to one you consider an enemy? It made no sense to her and so she filed it away for later study, wondering if she would ever truly understand humans.

"I've been thinking." Starbuck stared at Sharon, considered the fading bruises on her face, the healing cuts. "This isn't a fun time for you, either."

Sharon snorted, but said nothing. She looked over at Helo, barely visible through the trees that bordered the small clearing.

"They're tracking you, aren't they?" The question drew Sharon's attention back to Starbuck. "I know I accused you of leading them to us, but…" She shook her head, shrugged. "You're as scared as we are."

"I don't want them to have this baby." Sharon bit her lip, not sure if she should continue. Starbuck seemed receptive now, but that wasn't saying much.

"I still can't wrap my brain around you being pregnant with Helo's kid." She opened her can of stew. "I've never seen him like this." And it was Starbuck's turn to look toward Helo. "This isn't exactly shore leave, but even in the worst of times, I've _never_ known that man not to crack a joke or a smile." She looked back at Sharon. "What did you do to him?"

Sharon thought it must be a rhetorical question, but she chose to answer it anyway. Picking her words carefully, she said, "I was supposed to make him fall in love with me. Trust me." She felt the tears prick at her lids. "It wasn't supposed to happen in reverse. _I_ wasn't supposed to be affected."

"Do you love him?"

Sharon pondered the question, so simple and yet the most complicated, difficult question she had ever faced. Did she love Helo? She recalled the bitter jealousy she had felt when Starbuck and Helo had returned to camp holding hands – days ago now and a different camp site. She knew that they had been lovers once – another borrowed memory – but that it wasn't a regular thing for them. She supposed that knowledge was behind her strong reaction to seeing them together like that, but…

"He's in love with you." Starbuck's statement carried with it the weight of years of familiarity, of friendship. "It's killing him that you're a Cylon. He can't reconcile what he feels with what he knows and it's tearing him apart."

An unwanted and contrary surge of hope burned through Sharon at Starbuck's words. "I don't want to hurt him." She wrapped her arms around herself, around their baby.

Starbuck rolled her eyes and laughed, the sound harsh. "You can't help but hurt him, Sharon. Your _existence_ hurts him." She shook her head. "I've seen him wrapped up in a woman before, but never frakked up over a woman like this."

"You care for him, don't you?" Sharon was intensely interested in Starbuck's answer. To cover it, she took a tentative bite of the stew. Her stomach remained quiet and she took another bite.

"Of course I do. He's my friend." Her tone was so matter-of-fact that Sharon relaxed a little. "Can't play Triad for shit, but then that's part of his charm." Starbuck took a bite of her own stew.

"Is this what you wanted to talk about, Starbuck? Helo's love life?" Sharon was suddenly ravenous.

"You're not the friend I left on Galactica, but then, neither is she. You're Cylons, and yet you're both Sharon Valerii." She gave the lumpy stew a quick stir and took another bite. "You are the same person I knew, though. I don't know how, but you are. It's not your fault that the Cylons keep finding us. Not consciously, anyway. But whatever it is that makes you Cylon instead of human, the toasters are tracking it."

Sharon paused, her spoon hovering halfway between the can and her mouth. "What are you saying?" She felt as though judgment were being passed.

"I'm saying that I think you should go. Now, tonight. For Helo's sake, if nothing else. So he and I can get off this rock and back to Galactica." Their eyes met again and Sharon held her breath. "You have a better chance of staying out of metal hands on your own. Helo and I have a better chance of staying free if you're not with us."

"But I thought—"

"If we take you back to Galactica, maybe they won't kill you right away, but I think Helo's right. Eventually, they'd have to. I just can't see a way around it." There was another long pause and Sharon thought that was all that would be said, but then, "Sharon Valerii is my friend and I can't watch them execute you." There were demons in Starbuck's eyes. Sharon didn't want to know what those demons were – she had her own to deal with.

Starbuck said no more as she stood and took a can of stew out to Helo.

***

Helo's eyes flew open at the touch of her hand. "Sharon? What—?" He had been in that twilight state just before true sleep took over – normally a pleasant state in which to be, but not for him. Not since he had seen her kill a copy of…herself.

"Don't talk, just listen." Sharon's eyes glittered, caught and held filaments of moonlight. "I'm leaving." Her voice in the darkness was determined, allowing for no argument, just as he had heard it so many times in the past weeks.

His response was automatic. "You can't leave."

Sharon's hand remained on his shoulder as she sat beside him. He wasn't sure whether she realized she still touched him as she sighed and said, "It's me they want. If I'm not with you, then you and Starbuck have a chance to escape." She broke the physical connection, drew into herself as she wrapped her arms around her raised knees.

"Escape? With what? Your _friends_ have Starbuck's Raider." Helo shifted, leaned on his elbow. Sharon was close enough that he could feel the heat of her body and he closed his eyes against the unbidden memory of that sleek body under his.

Helo heard her move and he couldn't stop his eyelids from lifting. She licked her lips and he couldn't stop his eyes from drifting to her lush mouth. "Then you'll find another ship," she said softly.

He dragged his eyes back up and saw that she leaned toward him. Or maybe he had leaned toward her. Either way, her face was close enough to his that he could feel her breath, feather soft against his cheek. "I can't let you leave, Sharon."

"You don't have a choice. I'm going." Her voice softened and she definitely leaned in toward him, her arms no longer around her knees. "Just shut up, Helo. No more words."

Helo didn't know (didn't care) who moved first. All he knew was Sharon's mouth on his, the taste of her lips, the touch of her tongue. He opened his mouth and their tongues licked, tasted, danced. The slightest pressure of his hands on her shoulders took her to the hard ground. She snaked an arm up around his neck, slid her fingers into his hair and pulled him down to her.

He couldn't get enough of her mouth. His heart raced, the blood roaring through his head. Her strong hands worked at his flight suit and without thought he pulled back to help her, to work the fastenings of hers. When her arms were free, he pushed up her tanks, her bra, grazed her nipples with his teeth. She mewled far back in her throat, arching her back so that he could do more than just tease.

Working together, they stripped off everything until they were skin to skin. Helo sucked a hard nipple into his mouth. Sharon moaned, shifted, and he covered her body with his. She wrapped her longs legs around his hips, breathed, "Helo…" He stopped her voice with his mouth. Slid into her.

Slid home.

"Do you love me?" She repeated the question in time with each stroke. "Do you?" Her voice was all he could hear. "Do you?"

He kissed her hungrily, thrusting his tongue into her mouth as he thrust his cock into her sex. Felt tears on her face, tasted salt on her lips; he didn't know if they were his or hers.

"Yes…" he answered her.

Again, he thrust into her. "Yes…"

And again. "Yes…"

Shattered.

"Yes…!"

Helo opened his eyes, burning her image into his brain. Their eyes met and Sharon smiled, her expression triumphant.

***

Helo woke the next morning, cold and alone. She was gone. Sharon was gone and he didn't know if he'd ever see her again. All he had left were his memories and the last thing she had said to him, on the edge of sleep.

"I'll find you…"

It would have to be enough.


End file.
